Melissa's blog today got me thinking.
I love my siblings. ALL of them. We get along famously in our old age and laugh like crazy when we're together. We may all have a little annoying habit here or there, but like an old couple, we ignore it and move on. We like to reminisce about our childhoods and love sharing stories over and over and over again. Like how Nathan was a strange-looking baby, but turned out to be one good-lookin' dude. Or Ben's "broken bum face" Popsicle story. Or Nick and his gullibility and naivete. Eventually, however, the conversation strays to a topic that makes me sad. You see, I was a mean little boy. An angry, mean little boy. Don't get me wrong, I have lots of happy memories, but it seems like I blocked out most of the really mean things I did. But my siblings? They remember EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. And they don't mind sharing.
I always drive home from family dinner on those nights with a heavy heart. I've apologized again and again for being such a mean little boy. I don't know why I was nasty. Does it matter now?
I think I've changed. In fact, I don't think I'm anything like that mean little boy now. That little boy left me in high school. I'm a nice dad. I have fun with my kids. I'm a fantastic husband (ask Lisa). In fact, I believe I'm nearly the exact opposite of that mean little boy now. It's taken serving an LDS mission, a marriage to an angel, and many years of gospel study, but I am different. Repentance will do that to a person, you know?
So to all my siblings, I am sorry for being a mean little boy. I am sorry I scratched your faces or bit you or kicked you. I am sorry for being mean. But that Lance has died and 'gone the way of all the earth.'
Me, Myself and I
- Mateo
- I am a Mormon...married to Lisa. We have 5 awesome children. I am a gun rights advocate and believe the 'right to keep and bear arms' refers to an INDIVIDUAL right, as affirmed by the U.S. Supreme Court. I like to hunt big game, although I have only ever killed a single buck deer. I am an actor of sorts and have been in many local plays and musicals.
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3 comments:
Mean litttle boy - there's a few aspects I think of in sutuations like this. To some, you need not apologize, since they got over the pain you caused and forgave you even if you didn't say you were sorry.
Some, only forgive once they saw you had changed.
Some forgave because what's past is passed and you were just a kid and didn't know any better.
And to some. ..they never even knew you were a jerk, so you don't have to care or worry!
One thing is for sure - no matter what aspect of it all you or someone else falls in, each point of pain and hurt, malice or revenge is covered in one little thing called the atonement!
You know it is very nice that we all have moved passed the rotten things that we did to each other in our childhoods. I can honestly say that I remember more great times than I remember bad times. It was nice to grow up in a large family. Never a dull moment in the Pearson Clan, even now.
The mean little boy left you in high school?! Surely you mean AFTER high school? I seem to remember being teased incessantly. ;)
No, really, your post gives me hope for my own "mean little boys" who give each other bruises and nosebleeds constantly!
Glad to have found your blog, old friend!
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